That’s right, the paddling times were over. It was time to sink beneath the glossy surface. Before that happened Miss B and I had to undergo training. In the nearby swimming pool we were taught how to control our buoyancy, how to clear our respirator and the specific hand signals such as “I’m okay”, “go up”, “go down”, “help, I’m covered in angry sea urchins” etc etc. upon completion of this training I received my fancy certificate:
Here is the training:
The beard is a working progress…
So an Englishman, an American family, a Swiss, 2 Italians, 2 Scots and multiple Filipinos walk into a boat.
You’d think one of them would have seen it…
Please forgive the bad joke, however the boarding was easily the most chaotic part of the trip. The choppy seas fought bitterly against us, I was submerged under a wave and the boat hull crashed into me. I was informed on board that I had paint on my nose. Well… At least the boat didn’t win outright.
At the diving site I had my gear strapped on and then it was head over heels backwards into the water. I could see everything with amazing clarity and I had this miraculous power to breathe underwater. I immediately decreased my buoyancy and sank down about 10m. That… might have been a mistake. Almost instantly I had an intense pressure inside my head and a splitting headache. I quickly but calmly increased my buoyancy and rose to the surface again. I thought initially my mask strap was too tight so I adjusted that and sank down again. It took me 5 minutes and a lot of rising and falling for the headache to subside to something manageable. From there I took my first real look at my surroundings. (If by any chance the surroundings looked at me this is what they’d see):
In this world of bright white bubbles and soft pink corals I could see the outlines of other divers (visibility was about 10m) and small fish flitting about. I turned myself from a vertical position to horizontal and kicked myself closed to these alien looking structures. The coral was pretty in an otherworldly sort of way. I had never seen such structures or such shapes before, certainly nothing like it in any man-made structure or object.
The other divers were moving away, afraid to lose sight of them I followed closely behind, the group making up yet another school of brightly coloured beings. I met most of the Finding Nemo cast on my underwater travels although thankfully Bruce didn’t deign to make an appearance. I moved to the reef and came face to face with a school of emerald coloured fish. They hovered around me, curious about this new thing in their home. I waved to them (manners are important, even to fish) and caught up with the group again. There were many incredible things that amazed me, fortunately this went some way towards distracting me from clamping the regulator with my teeth and remembering to breath every other second. I saw squishy looking turquoise starfish and an oven-sized coral that looked like a woven basket, had I stood inside it without my flippers it would have encircled my waist.
By this point I thought 10 minutes had passed by. Time moves about 3 times slower underwater, probably due to the slow movements and small distances you cover. The instructor raised an inflatable warning to the surface and then bid us to rise. I rose right beside a plant stalk, it very nearly became my souvenir. I had called it my sea cabbage and in the event the boat had lost sight of us it would have sustained me for at least 24 hours. The boat however did not lose sight of us and it was a short interval bobbing up and down the waves before we clambered back aboard.
Here is me fresh from my first ever sea scuba experience:
My dives were done for the day and with a still aching head I was more than satisfied with my experience. Some of the others were just getting started though, Mr B went on his 14th dive (in total, not on that day) and the two Italians completed 3 dives at various diving spots around the islands perimeter. Turtles were sighted, shrimp spotted as well as a multitude of (what I think are) Angelfish. While the other dives were going on I either chatted with the Scots, had a nap in the sun, walked around the boat trying not to fall into the sea due to the rocking or bickered with one of my Filipina sisters Miss J who eventually bullied/coaxed me into the sea to swim again.
The sunny outing ended at about 4:30, all of us were hungry, ready to get clean and more than a few of us were a bit pink. Miss J’s shoulders radiated a heat which made me wince. Luckily I pretty much escaped with the exception of my tricep which I always miss. Sigh…
Disembarking was done with much less drama although as I’m writing this the waves have apparently somehow come onto the land as the ground is still swaying.
The evening passed in a flash of moments.
A tricycle down to White beach (they are a larger species than the mainland ones by the way):
Also a very enthusiastic jewellery seller (who dropped his price by 800 pesos!),
Master and Miss B feeding the 2 cats under the table who were promptly named Huckleberry Finn and Tom Sawyer,
and finally an evening dip into the pool accompanied by hot chocolate around a roaring bonfire. Not all at once though.
I had high hopes that the sea (which was drawing very close to the flames) would carry the fire out to sea and we’d see the glowing embers tumbled about the waves and flaming wood illuminating the foamy froth. Alas, that chaotic scene never did occur but perhaps next time… with a bit of help… and gasoline (or napalm?)
And on that cheery note my small holiday within a larger holiday was concluded, this is like a more relaxing version of Inception.
The adventures of the Ukulele kid 